Things That Were On My Mind Today

My boys are growing up so fast.

Sometimes I wonder what the day will feel like when I am not their number 1 anymore, or when Calvin will start to not want to play with my hair anymore, or when Wyatt will be too busy to sit beside me and talk with me.

I can't help but feel like I am not appreciating these moments with them enough. I try to, but sometimes it's easy to get caught up in the normalcy of life. You know, "Clean your room," "Hurry up! Let's go," "Maybe Later," "I love you, too." "Go to bed! Again!"

Being the Mom is a little bit unfair. It's hard to tell them no when you really want to say, "Yes, you can have anything that I could ever possibly want to give you. And here, take my heart, too!" But instead you have to say no --- A LOT. I know. I know. It's for their own good. But you can't tell me that you haven't ever been tempted to just give them any and everything they could want. I'm glad, though, that 1. I'm not capable of giving them most material things (hardly any actually) and 2. that giving them character in the long run is more gratifying. I'm also glad, however, that I am capable of giving them my attention and affection.

Yesterday Calvin and I made cookies together while Wyatt was napping. I really thought that I could have died in that moment in complete bliss. His sweet little voice was singing and chatting with me. His cute little kid hands were so messy and licked all over. His gingerbread men were so funny with chocolate chips all skewampy all over them. I'm glad that my children are a part of me and a part of Noah. I love that they are my flesh and blood.

My Mom and Dad used to sing this old song called "Turn Around" about a little girl, who seemed to grow everytime her Dad turned around. Sometimes it would make my Dad cry, and I couldn't understand. I get it now, Dad.

I put it in the sidebar of my music, if you want to hear it. If you do listen to it, you may as well grab a box of kleenex because you might cry. The snotty-nosed kind of crying, maybe even some shoulder shaking and puffy eyes. P.S. Mom and Dad sang it better. Waaayyyyy better, but this copy will just have to do.